01/26/2023
Long post - but worth the read.
On Christmas Day, I received an email from with a screenshot of a post from Ashtin. My heart dropped. We were 6 days away from what should have been the happiest day of our couple’s life and tragedy had struck.
On Christmas Eve, one of Ashtin’s bridesmaids, Melina Chavez, was in a car accident. She was taken to the hospital, but passed away in the early hours of Christmas Day.
I texted Ashtin and told her how sorry I was. We scheduled a call for the next day to discuss what this meant for the wedding. Ashtin told me about Melina - she was the life of the party, selfless, and the most loyal person. Ashtin said this put the wedding stress into perspective. She was concerned about having enough skewers for the chocolate fountain - now, she didn’t care. Ashtin wanted to remember Melina during the wedding day, but without the sadness and grief - Melina wouldn’t have wanted that.
Melina’s celebration of life was on Thursday and her funeral was the day before the wedding. Almost the entire wedding party came directly from the funeral to the rehearsal, dressed in black with tear-stained faces.
On the wedding day, I was floored at how everyone kept it together for Ashtin and John. The Bridesmaids/men were incredible, especially since Melina had been one of their best friends too. Melina’s bouquet was in the front row so Ashtin could see it and know that Melina was there. Her dress sat at the head table because Melina would have never missed this day.
Ashtin said Melina would be there - and she was. She helped make their day perfect. We thought the chocolate fountain wasn’t going to run - Melina made sure it did. We thought we were going to run out of cake plates - Melina made sure we didn’t. And when Ashtin and John departed, the bridesmaids/men brought her dress to the send-off and we knew she was there to bless Ashtin and John in their marriage.
If you are struggling with wedding stress, think about the people that are standing next to you and supporting you through your marriage. They are much more important than flowers or place settings. Sometimes that’s easy to forget. Thank you, Melina, for that reminder.