01/01/2018
Today is significant. Today marks the one year anniversary of a loaded up car, a full tank of gas, and a 5am wake up call. Today marks the day that I left the East Coast for the West, with my bestie and pup, to let adventure run it's course.
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I'm taking this whole "looking back" thing literally 😄, but somehow this picture feels more honest and real to me - something I want the first post of 2018 to be. Honest + real. Can I tell you a goal I have for myself + this brand new shiny year? My goal is to be comfortable being myself publicly, something I struggle with. OK, there I said it. As a planner, I'm used to refining every detail, creating cohesive designs, and logistically making sure everything is where it should be, when it should be. All things I love. BUT, when it comes to me personally I feel the need to do the same thing. Honestly, that's not my reality. I'm not always put together - I'm usually a few days late on folding that freshly washed laundry, the inside of my fridge looks pretty lonely more often than I'd like to admit and I quite often wake up with raccoon eyes and walk out the door forgetting to eat breakfast.
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I made my way to the West Coast with all the heart eyes for California - full of hope and expectation. It was a BIG year, and it was nothing like I expected. Building a foundation in a new place is hard. Building a business and a life at the same time is hard and often takes longer than we expect. I've honestly had a hard time seeing the beauty and the "why" in many things this year. Anyone else? Oddly enough, I'd still describe this year as beautiful. I've learned that there is no shame in building a dream, no matter how difficult or easy the journey has been or will be. I'm stronger because of the successes and failures this year and for the first time in awhile I truly believe that. The 1st of the year doesn't mean everything magically changes - hard things will probably still be hard and the laundry will probably still sit there. BUT I'M OK. I'm going after...no, I'm chasing after dreams the Lord has given me and there's nothing else I'd rather be doing.
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I have also fallen in love with California, so there's that. 💕