Abigail Ely Your ordained Minister

04/11/2026

Venus says...
Ma... why does smoke get all the love?! I am the one who can come to your wedding.
Me... princess i am already married. We marry other people.
Venus... ma you can't do that in Ohio!! That bigomy. You can only be married to dad!!!
Me... 🤦‍♀️ thats not what I meant but get off the shower faucet before you break it like you broke the sink.

03/24/2026

As a nurse I work some long days...
This is how our 'mascot' decided to "show love " after a 14 hour shift and all I wanted was a shower 🚿... everyone seems to love the 'evil looks' so I decided to share an 'evil act' today with some context. Because I would never make her move or turn on the water with her in the tub. She rules the house and she knows it. She stayed for a solid 5 minutes while i was just standing there asking her to please move. 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️ ?

03/22/2026

We (Smokey and I) stole this tip from the most upvoted tip on reddit for a groom from 3 years ago. We would love to give the reddit writer credit but all it says is [deleted] please feel free to tag yourself sir! It really is a GREAT TIP!! Stay tuned for smokey's joke of the week ... coming soon 🐈‍⬛️

03/15/2026

Smokes joke of the week!!

03/14/2026

Wedding season is coming...
Do you have a minister?
Dates available ❤️

03/07/2026

Also a reminder for all those interested in the "Snakes at a Wedding" service. Venus and Neptune are only available for outdoor services from May to September 1st.

Pluto will be joining the ranks this year as a stand in should one of the princesses be in shed... as it is not healthy for them to be disturbed during a shed cycle and let's be honest noone wants to deal with a cranky snake!!

Please remember that there is a service fee for the snakes and handlers. The handler fee is charged per snake. As I do not want to have to stop the ceremony should one decide to go for a walk!

Snake(s) $75 for the ceremony and before or after photos!
Handler fee per snake 🐍 $50.

*picture of Jupiter who does not choose to drape. He could be available for pictures but he prefers to pretend to be a scarf... and that isn't preferred with most humans.

03/07/2026

Smokey wanted to remind you wedding season will soon be upon us make sure to book your officiant soon!

Feel free to reach out to check availability! I can also recommend an amazing photographer and DJ!

P.S. Sara Faye I posted it on the correct profile now 🤣🤣🤣

10/08/2025

Listening to Charlotte Dobre and thinking I should give some advice...
If your spouse to be is writing their own vows it is IMPORTANT that you do the same. 😯 There is nothing wrong with traditional or ceremonial if thats what BOTH PARTNERS WANT 🥰 Link to share since I enjoy her content 😊

https://open.spotify.com/episode/3exJtAhg08B0PTQLETTkNo?si=C4OzbQTsSRmJ63dS6RwbsA

Petty POV with Charlotte Dobre · Episode

09/29/2025

Remember to get your marriage license before the ceremony! 🧡🎃🍂

Also I have spoken with Kim Karbon Photography she also has availability 🍂🧡🍂

Tell your friends 🧡🍂🧡

09/29/2025

Its autumn 🍂 the girls are in for the season. Unless you want to get married in my living room 🧡🍂

Sorry folks! Venus and Neptune will be available again in the spring!! It's getting to be too cold for them to venturing out.

06/22/2025

Thank you to all the wonderful foster parents out there. We appreciate you!!!!!