Hopler & Eschbach Funeral Home

06/13/2026

What is the best gift to send to a bereaved family?

A great question, but difficult to answer, as it is hard to rank the perceived value of different remembrance gifts, especially given that many cultures and religions have different traditions that might value one gift, but find no value in others.

First, the best gift for a family is to be there and be present for them. This means paying a home visit (if a close friend), attending remembrance events (viewing, funeral/memorial service, the burial, etc. ). NOTHING is more meaningful than being present and offering emotional support.

Flowers - the gift of flowers is an age old tradition, particularly for Christian or secular gatherings. Flowers generally are not appropriate at Jewish or Islamic funerals. Many eastern/oriental traditions place high value on flowers and certain colors have important meaning and significance.

Plants- some feel that giving a plant is better than cut flowers, because it continues to live. While that may be true, plants sometimes become a burden if too many are sent, or they are too large (biggest plant we received stood 6 feet tall) for families to incorporate into their home decor. Also plants can be a burden if a family lives a distance from where the funeral was held. It is not easy to take plants on planes and often there is no room in a car.

Candles, decorator items and photographs (often with custom frames) that include images of the deceased or express comforting messages may be appreciated too. But remember that sometimes they also become burdens over time - too many trinkets can overload emotions.

Food - Food is ALWAYS appropriate and not just at the immediate time of death. Often days and weeks after a funeral, gifts of food are appreciated and enjoyed by the bereaved. Gift baskets are nice, but remember too much food that is perishable and can't be frozen can end up being wasted. Food always brings comfort and is a very tangible act of love.

Monetary donations to a charity are common and purposeful, especially if it honors the values of the one who died.

Gifts of self/service: VERY meaningful. Examples include mowing a lawn, washing a car, helping with laundry, vacuuming or dusting a house, attending to a garden, pet sitting/walking. Anything that may become a challenge for the newly bereaved. A kind and meaningful action will be appreciated and save them some work during the adjustment period.

Indulgent gifts - to help heal and relax - these might include a massage, a manicure, a trip to a salt sauna. Something that helps people relax and provide self care.

Books and videos are helpful too - as they help people fill time and occupy their mind.

Gifts that we used to see frequently are diminishing - Bibles, religious vestments, Communion chalices and offertory sets (cruets for holding wine and water).

The fact is - sadly, families are often less religious today and all too frequently, even if they are religious, they already own sufficient quantities of Bibles or other sacred books and most churches have more than enough vestments (robes) for Priests and Communion sets. Although there may be circumstances these are appropriate and meaningful, often they end up not being used or donated to other entities.

Of course Mass cards and donations to a church memorial fund might be more purposeful if expressing a preference for a faith based gift.

The reality ultimately is, it is the thought that counts and brings comfort.

What is one memorial tribute you have received for a loved one that was especially meaningful to you?

06/12/2026

We are honored to have been entrusted with the final care of Eric Edwards, 68, of Chenango Bridge, formerly Greenville, NY.

Celebrate the life of Eric Edwards and join others in sharing memories, stories, and condolences.

06/12/2026

We are proud to support the Lourdes Hospital Foundation today as one of the sponsors of their annual charity golf tournament.

The foundation supports the good works of Guthrie Lourdes Hospital through education, purchases of equipment, patient services and so much more.

The day started sunny and bright for the foursome playing for us, but we fear they are all wet right now.

06/12/2026

We don't understand how these mistakes can happen.

Judging from the appearance of the funeral home, their website and staff photos, they seem to be a very professional and well managed funeral home. So often when we see these issues it is exactly the opposite. Yet - it happened.

We understand mistake can happen. We can make a typo in an obituary, play the wrong selection of music, order the wrong color flowers - simple things, that while stressful, can still be corrected or made right.

When it comes to care for the physical body - there is no room for any error.

Her request was highly unusual - and the efforts to carry it out are extensive - that would lead us to believe that everyone would have been hyper-aware of who she was and why she was hanging around so long.

Families deserve the best care - there was a failure here. It cannot be made right or rectified.

Families deserve better.

An Ohio family sued a funeral home for reportedly cremating their mother "against her express wishes and without authorization from the family."

06/11/2026

This might make some of our work a bit safer - the design helps put the weight on the equipment not the funeral directors back.

06/11/2026

This is a growing concern in many regions of our country, including New York State.

New York has a hybrid system of both coroners and medical examiners (A coroner is often an elected or appointed office and may or may not require medical training - locally (Broome County) coroners are medical professionals and they are appointed in some manner by county officials. Coroners who are physicians may personally conduct autopsies or work together with a pathologist.

A medical examiner is a physician specially trained in forensic medical science.

Some nearby counties allow those without a medical background to be a coroner. In these situations, it is common for the county coroner's office to contract with a pathologist at a hospital to conduct an autopsy and determine the cause and manner of death.

Larger metropolitan areas have utilize medical examiners - formally trained medical professionals, often with a focus on forensic pathology. The closest Medical Examiner's Office to Binghamton is Onondaga County.

The pathology department at Guthrie Lourdes Hospital in Binghamton provides autopsy services for seven or more counties who contract with them to provide this essential service. This is due to a combination of a lack of proper medical facilities to conduct an autopsy and also the lack of trained pathologists.

It matters not the system- coroner of medical examiner - there is a shortage of qualified personnel providing forensic services and it comes down largely to one main factor - money $$$$.

Small communities cannot afford to pay the salaries of highly trained medical personnel and with the cost of medical school and high earning potential in other medical fields, many medical professional eschew forensic science for more lucrative specialties.

The work performed by coroners, medical examiners, pathologists is essential for public health (often they might be the front line of identifying infectious diseases in a community) and public safety. Forensic investigations identify the criminal causes of death - one reason why in many (not all) communities, a coroner or medical examiner must provide a review of the manner and cause of death prior to a cremation occurring (to prevent hiding evidence of a crime).

A correct manner and cause of death is necessary in many cases for estate transfers - particularly insurance companies need medical information for they payout of claims.

We understand the balance of budgets stretched to the maximum - especially with the high number of deaths caused by drug abuse/overdose, which taxed the budgets of many poorer communities.

We hope that North Carolina can get this figured out and a happy balance is returned.

Without them, bodies will stack up at morgues and funeral homes and some death certificates won’t be signed.

06/10/2026

We are honored to have been entrusted with the final care of Elaine Mertz, 78, of Westover (Johnson City).

Celebrate the life of Elaine Mertz and join others in sharing memories, stories, and condolences.

06/10/2026

June 10, 1692 - In Salem Village in the Massachusetts Bay Colony, Bridget Bishop, the first colonist to be tried in the Salem witch trials, is hanged after being found guilty of the practice of witchcraft.

Bishop, known around town for her dubious moral character, frequented taverns, dressed flamboyantly (by Puritan standards), and was married three times. She professed her innocence but was found guilty and executed by hanging on June 10.

Thirteen more women and five men from all stations of life followed her to the gallows, and one man, Giles Corey, was executed by crushing.

She is remembered today with an inscription on a stone at the Salem Witch Trials Memorial.

06/10/2026

Today's "Ask the funeral director" question:

I recently heard another local funeral director refer to the funeral "industry". It left me feeling very cold. Is this a common reference?

Good question - It leaves us cold too. Our answer would be that all funeral directors and funeral firms are not the same. We do not consider any of our works and efforts to serve client families as being part of an industry - we call it the funeral service profession.

Let's take a look at the definitions of these two words and how they differ.

Profession: a principal calling, vocation, or employment
: the whole body of persons engaged in a calling
: a calling requiring specialized knowledge and often long and intensive academic preparation : an act of openly declaring or publicly claiming a belief, faith, or opinion

Industry: manufacturing activity as a whole, the nation's industry
: a distinct group of businesses that provide a particular product or service the banking industry: a department or branch of a craft, art, business, or manufacture especially : one that employs a large personnel and capital especially in manufacturing: systematic labor especially for some useful purpose or the creation of something of value

While there certainly can be some overlap between the definitions, we focus on the foundation of the funeral profession as one of service and dedication, engaging our whole self in serving others, with a declaration of values that the nature of our work is sacred and that all lives have value. We profess our belief in honoring those lives and work to provide comfort to those left behind.

We don't discount that elements of industry can be part of our efforts - we are a distinct group of people providing a service and we do offer something of value - but we are more apt to make the statement - Similar but not the same. It comes to attitude, purpose and a calling.

The word industry is cold and discomforting to us. While we are necessarily a business and we have realities that we must consider such as payroll, property expenses, taxes, vehicles, etc. The main focus of what we do is provide specialized care for the dead and empathy and compassion to those they leave behind. That is our main focus and by doing that, the needs of the business element support themselves.

There are elements of industry in the commercial relationships we create with casket manufacturers, stationers, livery companies and chemical companies, but that is the back door of the funeral profession. We look at those companies as the funeral industry in support of the funeral service profession.

When you consider which funeral home you want to serve your family, listen to the words spoken by different funeral directors... and if they consider themselves called to a profession or are part of an industry.

You will quickly know who will better serve your needs.

06/08/2026

It's been awhile since we shared a bit of humor.

This is one we had never seen before and it made us laugh. We hope it makes you laugh too.