23/06/2025
Reposting from a channel.
A Message to the Parents: Fear Allah Regarding the Youth — Do Not Make Marriage a Burden
My dear brother and sister, have you ever stopped to ask: When did marriage become a burden? When did it stop being a sacred bond and turn into a parade of extravagance, glitter, and endless demands?
Today, in many Muslim communities, we see a disturbing trend—dowries that break backs, weddings that break banks, and celebrations that drown in disobedience to the very One whose name we invoke to bless the union. Lavish halls, mixed gatherings, music, dancing, endless parties—all under the banner of “joy” and “custom”—as if these are what make a marriage blessed or dignified.
But ask yourself: If the value of a woman were measured by her dowry, then surely the daughters of the best of creation ﷺ would have set the highest standard. But they didn’t. Fāṭimah—the leader of the women of Paradise—was married for a simple piece of armour. That was all ʿAlī had. The Prophet ﷺ did not question her worth. He did not shame his companion. He married them in simplicity, with taqwā, not with glitter. If her worth lay in gold, silver, or garments, he would have demanded fortunes. But he didn’t. Why? Because the value of a woman is in her religion, her character, and her upbringing—not in her price tag.
Today, many sisters are treated like commodities—appraised and valued by numbers, not hearts. And many brothers are left helpless, crushed by impossible demands. Engagement parties, contract parties, wedding receptions, and after-parties—each more elaborate than the last. And each one a further step away from the Sunnah and into the trap of societal pressure. A young man said: “Even if I worked my whole life, I wouldn’t be able to afford what they’re asking for.”
By Allah, this is oppression. By Allah, this is not from our religion.
The Prophet ﷺ said: “The most blessed marriage is the one with the least expense.”
Yet we’ve made expense a condition for acceptance.
So I ask you, with a heart that fears for this Ummah—Fear Allah regarding the youth. Fear Allah regarding your daughters and sons. Do not chain marriage with debt. Do not mix your joy with sin. Do not sacrifice barakah for a moment’s applause. Let simplicity return to our weddings. Let purity fill our homes. And let the Sunnah be our light once again.
For a marriage built upon taqwā will stand firm even if the walls are bare, but a marriage built on pride and extravagance will collapse—even if draped in gold.
