12/09/2025
When I came across this post saying “Marrying a woman from a poor background is a serious financial mistake,” it hit home.
I come from a poor background. And nowadays, they say once you hit 30, you become the background.
I remember one time after an interview, some ladies and I were discussing marriage in a matatu. Theoretically, marrying into stability sounded simple. But when we unpacked the practicality, it was harsher than we imagined.
I’ve read countless stories of women who faced torture from in-laws, especially mothers-in-law—simply because they came from a poor background. Nobody chooses where they’re born. Statistically, not everyone will be rich.
A friend once asked me, “Jane, what happened to you that you work this much?” My answer was simple: I’m attracted to stability. That’s why I push twice as hard. Ipo siku itajipa.
But here’s the truth: one mistake I’ve avoided is chasing a man just because he has money. If that man’s “stability” is tied to his family’s support, as a woman, you better make money of your own. And when you marry such a man while coming from a poor background, be prepared for the lowest form of human treatment.
Some men even leave women they once loved to marry into financial alignment, choosing families with equal wealth over genuine connection.
We grew up watching Nollywood where kings fell in love with barefoot girls carrying water buckets. Reality is different. In today’s world, ladies, work for your money. Even if it’s just 100 shillings a day. Your beauty, body, or even love alone won’t earn you respect.
I’ve seen in-laws take children from their mothers, labeling them unworthy because they came from poverty. Poverty robs dignity in ways society doesn’t admit.
My prayer: May every man and woman from a poor background receive wisdom and willingness to build their own. May God bless the work of your hands, and may you live to enjoy the fruit of your labor.
