06/08/2026
Did you know you can choose your own funeral celebrant?
It’s something most people don’t realise until they’re right in the middle of planning a funeral, usually while exhausted and grieving. So, I wanted to share it now, before anyone needs it.
Usually, this decision is left to the funeral director who will recommend someone from a small pool of celebrants they regularly work with. They are likely to be lovely and capable, but that doesn’t mean they are the type of person you would have chosen.
And, often, it really matters.
🔹Maybe your loved one was part of the LGBTQ+ community, and you want someone who understands that experience from the inside to tell their story.
🔹Maybe you’ve lost someone to su***de, and you’d feel more comfortable with a celebrant who has personally experienced that kind of loss.
🔹Maybe your loved one was a bit of an odd duck, someone who didn't fit the usual shape of things, who felt life more intensely than most and spent a long time working out where they belonged in it. You might want a celebrant who recognises that and who won’t tidy the edges off to make your person easier to sum up.
I’ll be honest: those examples happen to describe me. But there are times I won’t be the right celebrant for you either!
🔹Maybe your loved one's life was shaped by an era that a younger celebrant would only ever know second-hand. You might rather have someone who carries that history too, not just someone who's read about it.
If you want to choose your own funeral celebrant, you absolutely can. Many of us are active on social media, and it’s a great way for you to watch how we present ourselves and get an idea of our personalities, our lived experiences and our values.
As a funeral celebrant, what matters most to me is that you know you have a choice – whether that choice is me or someone else entirely.
