22/08/2026
"My name is Carrie and I'm a Mortician here at Crosbie Matthew Funeral Directors in Kirkcaldy.
I suppose my story starts a long time ago, it was never something that I set out wanting to do, I don't think many people do really. I'd always wanted to be an artist, I really like drawing and painting so I went and did my degree in that.
When I was little, my brother died and when I was a teenager, my sister died, so I've always been aware of death really, I painted about my sister at art school, that was my therapy. My mum gave me a book called "Way To Go" by Alan Spence, this book was about a man who'd inherited his fathers undertaking business. As I made my way through it, I thought "this sounds like great job, maybe I'd be good at it" I knew grief all to well so I saw it as a way to help people. When I started, I found myself in the back making coffins and as you'll understand, grief can cause families to fall out, I found that to be stressful at 21 and realised I wasn't as suited to funeral directing as I thought I'd be. I also learned to embalm loved ones and I just loved it.
There's something about tending to the deceased, it feels like a sacred privilege. People are trusting you with a loved one at a very vulnerable stage and I feel like I'm doing something useful, it's a rewarding thing. I set off to get my qualifications and initially I moved around, working freelance for small funeral companies. I finally found my place here at Crosbie Matthew, I like how things are run, it's a great team and I've been here since January 2017. My daughter had just turned one and I was looking to get back to work, it was the right place at the right time.
My daughter is 10 now and we've had very open discussions about death and what I do, I have my beliefs about it but one day we found a small moth that had died and she was asked what happened so I placed it in the garden and told her it would come back as a flower! She attended her great grannies funeral and she was respectful and happy that she was involved I think and not excluded. They know when they're ready to face it I think.
I get immense satisfaction when I'm able to do my job to the highest level when I present someone to their family. In this world, you will see it all. The more work people need, the more satisfying it is knowing I'm able to prepare that person for their family. This will be the last time they see their loved one so it has to be perfect.
People ask me alot if I find it difficult and I do, mostly when it's children that are the same age as my daughter, whatever age that might be and I might need a hug after it. My first time was difficult, I felt like I didn't know what I was doing and sat on this bin in the mortuary and just thought "how did I end up here" but I did it, I got through it.
I think when people have a lasting memory of their loved one in pain or maybe they suffered horribly at the end of their life, it adds to the pain and trauma of the loss, it's harder to process. Being able use the skills I've learned through the years to then present someone looking peaceful in their coffin for their family, makes me feel like I've done a good job and that's a privilege"
Thank you to Carrie and Crosbie Matthew Funeral Directors Ltd, Kirkcaldy for inviting me in for a chat. This story is a sensitive one but if you'd like to share it, please do. My granny was looked after by the team some years back so I was able to thank them personally ❤️
