27/07/2025
These are not my words, but are from a very wise fellow Celebrant Mr Josh Withers.
There’s this phrase I keep coming back to when people ask how to make their wedding feel special: Your wedding isn’t a pig you need to put lipstick on. Your wedding is awesome already.
It’s already special. You’re getting married.
You’re choosing each other. You’re loved, and you love. That’s the heart of it.
So before we start dressing it up with neon signs and choreographed sparkler exits, let’s start where it matters: looking within.
The real work of having an awesome wedding
The real work isn’t about Pinterest boards or colour palettes.
It’s asking questions like:
What do we actually care about?
What makes us laugh?
What makes our relationship feel real, honest, solid?
What do we want to remember 10 years from now?
How do people like us get married?
Once you’ve got a handle on that, then and only then, do the bells and whistles make sense. Because now you’re not decorating for the sake of it — you’re amplifying what’s already there. You're shining a light on the awesome.
Ways to personalise a wedding
Here’s a big list of ideas that couples have used to make their day feel more “them.”
Some are simple. Some are extra. Some are cheesy in the best way.
Pick what feels right. Ditch the rest.
Ceremony
Write your own vows (or write them together)
Walk down the aisle together as a couple, or in a way that is real to you.
Have a friend or family member do something that means something.
Choose a ceremony space that feels like your backyard, even if it’s not.
Include a ritual that reflects your culture or shared values.
If someone in your life has played a role of influence, let them bring some words to the ceremony, not just 'because', but with purpose.
Tell your own story instead of following a script.
Have your dog there. Always have dogs anywhere really.
Honour family in a way that would actually honour them and make them feel special, personalise it to them.
Music
Walk in to a song that gives you goosebumps.
Choose music from your actual own playlists, not just “wedding songs”.
Have live music for the ceremony or drinks.
Make a surprise playlist for your partner.
Food & Drink
Serve your favourite takeaway as a late-night snack.
Custom cocktails with cute names that reflect you.
Share a meal, picnic-style, with guests.
Skip the fancy cake and go with your Nan’s pav.
Vibe & Flow
Build in pause points to take a breath.
Have a first look, or a last look, or no look at all.
Run a relaxed schedule that prioritises time with people over posed photos.
Invite fewer people but spend more time with them.
Space & Style
Use candles, rugs, and warm lighting instead of big decor.
Get ready together in the same room.
Include photos or memories from your story so far.
Ditch the “getting ready” stress and sleep in then get a larger hair and makeup squad that starts closer to the ceremony time.
Words & Symbols
Write each other a letter to open before the ceremony.
Include a favourite quote or lyric in the ceremony.
Make the welcome sign actually welcoming (no fonts murdered in Canva).
Acknowledge the people who can't be there.
But here’s the real truth
All of that only matters after you’ve done the hard part:
looking within.
Ask yourselves:
What are we trying to feel on the day?
What do we want our guests to feel?
What do we already have in our relationship that we want to shine a light on?
Because the best weddings I’ve ever been part of weren’t the most expensive.
They weren’t the most styled or “on trend.”
They were the ones where the couple showed up honestly, fully, unapologetically themselves.
So don’t try to invent a version of your wedding that looks good in someone else’s slideshow.
Shine a light on what’s already true.
Amplify the love that’s already there.
And let the day be the day.
