Botanisör Florist Launceston

Botanisör Florist Launceston Local florist on the outskirts of the Launceston CBD cocooned in Miledge Lane.
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We start Spring with a baby update. The baby birds flew the nest on Saturday. Well, they jumped. Mama rounded them up an...
01/09/2025

We start Spring with a baby update. The baby birds flew the nest on Saturday. Well, they jumped. Mama rounded them up and spent the day finding food and filling them up. Sunday they birded up and left the car park to find out what life is all about. And hopefully p**p on bigots.
Due to the rising cost of health care and the availability of Dr appointments I have resorted to Backyard Healthcare. It’s not an organization, I just go p*e under a tree in the backyard and wait. If ants gather = diabetes. If the grass dries up = high salts. If it smells like BBQ = high cholesterol. If I forget to pull my pants up = Alzheimer’s. If it looks like a sprinkler = Parkinson’s. Due to no trees in my yard the unhoused and I have chosen a different tree each in the park. Launceston’s newest outdoor pathology lab on the kanamaluka riviera.
To test if you are a bigot, eat four liters of ice cream as fast as you can. If you get brain freeze, you’re not a bigot. And if you recently started believing that different groups of people deserve to be treated as less than humans with no compassion, you may have been kicked in the head by a horse.
And as our Spring starts Greta Thunberg and many other activists have overnight left Barcelona in a flotilla of 20 boats represented by citizens of 44 countries. Heading to break the siege of Gaza and deliver humanitarian aid. The Global Sumud flotilla will be joined by more boats from Tunis, Catania, Genoa and the Asian flotilla. The world’s largest ever humanitarian flotilla. Doing something because the World’s leaders thoughts, prayers & stern threats are… useless!
Anyway thanks for coming to my rant/ Ted talk/ breakdown. We sell fresh flowers and gifts sourced right here in the State while trying to make people happy and maintain a circular economy. While the smiles and glee of customers finding a magical place in the store really does keep me going.
Have a great week and remember I hate pop up notifications unless they are from a toaster.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.vom or ⛵️🕊️🫶 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

It’s Friyay and Winter has one more crack in its tail. So just a reminder that we have besides flowers, candles, skin ba...
29/08/2025

It’s Friyay and Winter has one more crack in its tail. So just a reminder that we have besides flowers, candles, skin balms and bath-bombs for a truly self care relaxing weekend.
Is Gin and vodka self care? In moderation, got yah. That’s why my house is called “Moderation”. We also stock both of them too. Tasmanian distilled.
Why is it when a Brit, American or Australian move to another country they are called Ex Pats? When a Mexican, Thai or Nigerian do the same they are called immigrants? So ex pat is a choice but an immigrant is poverty, desperation or a threat? Is it skin colour or bank balance that determines this language?
Me, I’d rather live next door to immigrants and refugee than a fascist or a racist.
And if you’re struggling this time of year let me offer a little motivation. Even a broke crackhead can find a way to get high. You too will find a way forward. To succeed, not get high.
Have a great weekend, stay warm and remember meat eaten as comfort food is also an emotional support animal. Emotional support artichoke if you’re vegan.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 💨🐄🍆 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Its a wet old Wednesday. So stay warm, dry and find a nice bowl of soup for dinner. Jammies, toast & tomato soup is the ...
27/08/2025

Its a wet old Wednesday. So stay warm, dry and find a nice bowl of soup for dinner. Jammies, toast & tomato soup is the tradition. I’m bucking that with Barley & white bean. Don’t knock it till you try it. Fibre never tasted so good.
Did I tell you the new plants arrived? Rubber plants, peace lily, prayer plants, spring bulbs and a few large Peperomia. And string of pearls. Owh, and some Senecio, formally known as Cineraria. In blue or purple. Pop on in and have a gander.
You know if the idiots running the world do start WWIII, you know the millennials will call it “wheee”. And somehow that makes me feel better.
Random thought, Israel has the right to go F*€K itself.
I’m writing a play about the writing of the American constitution and it goes like this:
Ben Franklin: write down “No dumb ass President.“
Alex Hamilton: Stop saying that.
Ben Franklin: I’m telling you you’re going to regret not writing that down.
Stay warm and if you get cold the best way to warm up is to hug a friend. Or a stranger. Or Mitch Brown. Congratulations Mitch, you have made the lives of so many youngsters so much better by being brave and honest.
Keep up the good work and remember worrying is like walking around with an open umbrella waiting for it to rain. Close it and only open it when it’s needed. Like today.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🪴🏉🥫112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Proving that weddings do not have to cost the Earth. Try this cheery little number. Forget the magazines and the influ...
25/08/2025

Proving that weddings do not have to cost the Earth. Try this cheery little number. Forget the magazines and the influencers. Do it your way and make it memorable.
If you are after something a bit different, we are your people. Let’s talk.
We don’t care what you believe in. We only care how you treat people. Enough with the white, creams & browns. Be the authentic you want to see in the world.
Speaking of, why is it when the rich rob the poor it’s called business, but when the poor fight back it is called violence? When people point out the government’s hypocrisy it is called terrorism? Do these guys need a dictionary?
We align with leaders of compassion. As the third member of the holy trinity,(Dolly Parton, The Dalai Lama and), Jacinda Ardern said in a sp*ech at Yale University, “Empathy has never started a war, never sought to take the dignity of others and empathy teaches you that power is interchangeable with another word, responsibility. “
It is also our responsibility to not extort profits at the cost of people, customs, culture or the environment.
So if you would like a shopping experience where you are celebrated for your uniqueness rather than being tolerated, give us a try. “I”may not like your choice but I will respect it. It’s all the freaky people make the beauty of the world.
Have a great week and remember the USA is the only country to ever drop nuclear weapons to decide which countries can be trusted with nuclear weapons.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🦄🌈💐 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Spring is on its way and the trees are erumpent. That means the buds and blossoms are bursting forth. Now I wish I was a...
22/08/2025

Spring is on its way and the trees are erumpent. That means the buds and blossoms are bursting forth. Now I wish I was a little more erumpent in the morning. It’s the beds fault for being so cozy.
Now when the dinosaurs died they became dinosaur bones, those bones became fossil fuel. Fossil fuel in the form of petroleum. Petroleum makes Polypropylene plastic that makes plastic dinosaurs. So does that make plastic dinosaurs the real dinosaurs? And by burning petroleum in our cars is it releasing dinosaur breath that is heating the planet? Is this revenge of the Dinos?
Tomorrow is National Buy Flowers Because You Totally Deserve Them Day. Oh, it’s not official or anything and I may have made it up But Sunday is National Tequila Day. For real!
You get a flowers and you get a flowers… you know the drill.
Or plants! We have a new shipment arriving today. Well more of a truchment because we are a bit too far from kalamaluka to do it that way. And we don’t got no ferries to use. City to G-town, stopping at Legana, Dilston, Lanena, Swan Point, Deviot, Beauty Point and Clarence Point. Have your tickets ready please.
Now explain it to me like I’m in Primary school, how does soldiers killing each other solve the world’s problems? Cos me and a whole heap of other kids don’t understand it. We are still being taught fighting is wrong. Let’s put flowers in those guns. Not bullets.
Have a great weekend and remember vasectomies are the best way of preventing abortions.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🦕🦴🛢️🦖 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

How are those Book Week costumes going? I haven’t seen one Wally yet. As wise people have said, reading is fundamental. ...
20/08/2025

How are those Book Week costumes going? I haven’t seen one Wally yet. As wise people have said, reading is fundamental. And if you doubt me go read an Obama sp*ech, then a Tramp, sorry Trump sp*ech. It’s crystal clear.
Actually I have just reread Ian Fleming’s James Bond novel Moonraker. Published in 1955 it is about a super-rich industrialist who makes rockets seeking to cause chaos because he is a secret N**i. How did he dream up such a silly idea?
By the way Elon has been quiet. Should we do a welfare check on him? Or did the baby mommas unionise and have him bound & gagged?
Our potted bulbs arrived. So many combinations, they look fantastic. Ah, the smells of Spring. Can’t wait.
But you now what does get up my nose? Having to pay taxes that go towards subsidising fossil fuel projects and they don’t have to pay tax at all.
Lastly, you know when someone gives you that Myer in the streets Best & Less in the sheets vibe and then they utter “I’ll take you out when the ankle bracelet comes off”. Block and delete. I can hear the missing teeth while they type.
Keep up the good work and remember it doesn’t matter if you win or lose in a cake eating contest because you get to eat cake.

☎️ 6334 9287, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🚀🛢️💕🏰 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

If the news has taught me anything over the last week, it’s that if climate protesters want to avoid being hassled by th...
18/08/2025

If the news has taught me anything over the last week, it’s that if climate protesters want to avoid being hassled by the police. The should dress-up as Neo-N**is.
Hi, welcome the a new week. Buckle up, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.
My bank manager hates it when I call him Dick. Especially because his name is Steve. I did tell him I wanted to be stupid rich. He said I was half way there.
What does a man do only once in his life time but a woman does every year after they turn twenty-nine?
I saw it written “When he comes to visit and it makes my hole weak.” Spelling matters people! Read lots of books this Book Week!
Why is slavery taught as the history of Black peoples and not the history of White people?
We are expecting a delivery of flowering bulbs in terracotta pots. Hopefully they will be here by Wednesday so I can get a good pic for you. There is supposed to be daffs, snowdrops, belladonna & muscari. Yumm!
It has been reported that a thief has stolen The Lyin’ King’s vi**ra. He is claiming a stolen er****on.
Have a great week and remember what doesn’t kill you makes you have to work longer.

☎️ 6344 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🥏📚💰 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Answer: its turn 30.

Happy Friyay and the start of Book Week. Yes! That week when you can dress up AND read books. What is your favourite boo...
15/08/2025

Happy Friyay and the start of Book Week. Yes! That week when you can dress up AND read books.
What is your favourite book? I can narrow it down to A brief history of mankind by Yuval Noah Harari, Jo’s boys by Louisa May Alcott or anything by Armistead Maupin. What does that say about me?
Oh, children’s book? That’s Harry the dirty dog by Gene Zion. Or the sequel Harry the REALLY dirty dog. It’s leather bound. With locks.
Ooops, I’ve been distracted for the epstienth time today.
Do you know the link between flowers and drugs? Apart from medicinal. Yes, you get Endorphins and Dopamine when you buy flowers. Serotonin comes when you’re out in the fresh air delivering them and Oxytocin kicks in when you give flowers and get hugs. Your brain will release all these feeling good drugs because you’re nice and kind and thoughtful.
Feel good and let your local florist be your dealer.
Shop is full of bunches, stems and ready to go boxes and bouquets.
Have a great weekend and remember if thoughts and prayers actually worked, he’d be dead by now.

☎️ 6334 9187? 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🌸📚🌼 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

P.S. you can get all those brain drugs from Fair Trade chocolate too. Just saying.

The added benefit of the Hanging Wall of Helmets. Can I get a grant for this wildlife reserve?
13/08/2025

The added benefit of the Hanging Wall of Helmets. Can I get a grant for this wildlife reserve?

Good news Humpday. Alstroemeria has returned from its Winter holiday. YEAH! It’s a customer favourite. And local. Life i...
13/08/2025

Good news Humpday. Alstroemeria has returned from its Winter holiday. YEAH! It’s a customer favourite. And local. Life is good.
We are also celebrating Namibia’s President, Her Excellency Netumbo Nandi-Ndaitwah, who firmly rejected a proposal from the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation to conduct trials in her country of a hormonal intrauterine device designed to prevent pregnancy for up to eight years. And who said colonialism is dead?
Want to spook the neighbours? Rename your WiFi “Police Surveillance Van No 2”. Oh the fun you’ll have.
Speaking of, here’s a conspiracy theory that in today’s world is only a half baked idea. Putin is flying to Alaska, because it is one of the few places he won’t be arrested because of ICC warrants, he and Trump settle the war with Ukraine, no land changes hands. Trump gives Alaska back to Russia, as it once owned by them and is still referred to a Russian America by the Bruskies. America cannot drill for the oil under Alaska but Russia can. Trump holds oil shares in new venture. Problem solved, give the sorry excuse for a man a Nobel Prize.
Throw it. Throw it hard at his head like a can of soup. And while I’m at it, how come those Epstein files disappeared faster than a bullet wound on an ear? Kamala tried to put the US in USA. He only brings out the S.A.
Well I’m off to play with the alstro. Seriously it couldn’t be any fresher or straight off the farm.
Keep up the good work and remember the far-right are angry because they’re being judged by their content and not the colour of their skin.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 🏆🤴⚰️ 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

On the good news front this week, the Global Sumud Flotilla would be launching dozens of boats from Spain on the 31st of...
11/08/2025

On the good news front this week, the Global Sumud Flotilla would be launching dozens of boats from Spain on the 31st of August. These will be joined by dozens more when they reach Tunisia while picking up more boats along the way. This is an initiative mobilising more than 44 countries trying to break the siege of Gaza and open a humanitarian corridor to distribute aid. You can follow their progress .
Did you know blink is the plural of wink.
And in “celebrities reducing women to baby-making machines”, JK Rowling has spewed forth the moral and scientific opinion that if you are born with egg-producing equipment, even if it is faulty, it is proof you are a woman. So, if it is so told, women now include chickens, platypus, fish, Cadburys, snakes, lizards, Kinder Surprise and spiders. The same Joanne Kathleen who initialised her name to sound less female and more androgynous to sell her wizard and fairy books.
I want to go back to the days when the biggest anxiety in life was stopping the cassette tape before the DJ started back announcing the top 10 song I was taping.
Luckily though I have the very relaxing job of selling flowers. At least I am one of the lucky ones who can say I thoroughly enjoy what I do. Come on in and I will share that joy.
Have a great week and remember there are people out there that would rather let their children die rather than admit “tree hugging hippy environments “ were right.

☎️ 6334 9187, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or ⛵️📚💐 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

You’ve hear of “Elf on a shelf”? If so can you title today’s puzzle? And yes that is Old Leatherface, with Old Yam T**s....
08/08/2025

You’ve hear of “Elf on a shelf”? If so can you title today’s puzzle? And yes that is Old Leatherface, with Old Yam T**s.
Do you want to get away for the weekend to relax and get some peace and quiet but you don’t know what to do with the kids? Drop them at a siblings house, then block them. Only the best parenting advice here.
Maybe the grownups of my youth were right. Could it be that I won’t be truly happy until someone looses an eye. Any volunteers?
Actually, back then I never envisioned the future would have robots creating artistic soulless versions of people, that I’d spend half my pay on rent and the other half on five strawberries and I’d be addicted to a pocket computer that made me sad everyday.
But flowers cheer me up. Flowers cheer everyone up. We have loads of flowers that are great for mood enhancement and will benefit the community as a bonus. And benefit the Earth if you compost them when they expire.
The answer to today’s quiz is, “PDF-File”. Just keep saying it over and over, faster and faster.
Have a great weekend and remember one way to reduce stress is to meditate, another is to not live under a fascist government. Follow for more wellness tips.

☎️ 6334 9287, 🖥 www.botanisorflorist.com or 💾💿🗂️ 112 Cimitiere Street, Launceston.

Address

Shop 5/112 Cimitiere Street
Launceston, TAS
7250

Opening Hours

Monday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Tuesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Wednesday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Thursday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Friday 8:30am - 5:30pm
Saturday 8:30am - 1am

Telephone

+61363349187

Website

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