21/09/2022
Yesterday was my birthday! I’m 37! 🥳 I remember when my mom turned 37. Which I know isn’t that impressive because I was 12 at the time and that was just like 10 years ago… right?
In all seriousness, I don’t feel 37. My oldest always tells me that I act 18 or 45. (45 when I’m in “work mode”.) I just feel like me, and I’ve never been able to say that with the clear confidence that I can say it with today. I feel like me.
Thank God for the obstacles that got me to this place.
I still have obstacles. Sometimes my brain decides to reroute me toward them, for no discernible reason. This birthday eve I was hit with a case of… why me? It doesn’t happen very often, but I felt like everything was suddenly heavy and no one was there to help me, as I wrangled three boys from a late soccer game to dinner, and into the bath, and then had to get everyone prepped and packed for the week and begin my own scheduling, clear email, and etc.
I didn’t feel like celebrating anything, and I felt like no one was supporting me.
I woke up at 3am on Monday. My first thought began to creep in “well, isn’t this just…”. I stopped. Nope. Not the vibe, SAP. Enjoy it. Soak in this moment and day because you CAN.
I mediated. For basically 3 hours 🤣 and when I opened my eyes the whole world was back to normal.
I had 2 little blondie boys snuggling all over me. “Mom? Yes? I love you.” All 3 of the boys rushed out to the kitchen to make me breakfast in bed à la Bluey, and I might be biased but it was honestly AMAZING and I never want to forget that scene and feeling.
I got to spend my morning working with friends, and my team created a video for my birthday that had me sobbing for HOURS. If you saw me crying in my car yesterday… yeah, you did.
I have never been more grateful and fulfilled for all of the messages I received.
I spent the evening with friends at the most amazing party, and took a long bath when I got home.
Honestly, 18, 37, and/or 45 year old me is so happy that I can stop and smell all these roses. I said it last year and I’ll say it again… can it get any better?!
