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FREE. No joke. I’m looking for three people. Next Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Business owners. People that work with their hands. People that make beautiful things. I realized that taking photos for other creatives is something I miss so much. I’d love to gift some lifestyle headshots and documentation of your creative process. If you’re not sure if you qualify. Just ask! In order to do so, share one of these photos and tag me in your story. I’ll email you by Friday!
Life is so weird. When I opened up about mental health I received so much thankfulness from people for making them feel better about seeking help. So I am going to share some more health related things.
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I have worked so hard on my body positivity this year where I stopped feeling guilty for living in my body I have. I stopped being scared to wear a crop top, or dress for what made me happy just because people didn’t think fat people should wear certain things. Then started having some issues a few months ago where it was clear I needed to find the problem. From there I was diagnosed with fatty liver. Apparently it’s NAFLD, because the irony is I don’t drink. Well it looks like the solution is that I need to eat better and lose weight so it doesn’t progress. They say 10%. No this is not just a doctor thing. It’s lots of research. This is what I have to do because no medication will fix it. I feel right back where I was a year ago with a negative self image and overthinking everything. We will always be a work in progress no matter how much progress we think we make. I’ve been heavier (besides when I lost weight to get pregnant) for most of my life so *just a reminder that not all fat people have health issues that makes them need to lose weight*
Photo from the ever so amazing
I think I need a day alone in the desert before school starts back up in two weeks.
I’ve been to the beach twice this past week. I’ve had this strong feeling of being extremely grateful. I’ve come to a strong realization that there are people who go their lives and never see the ocean. Never step foot on the sand and feel it between their toes. I love San Diego. That is all.
*appreciation post* Here’s the thing. If you ever asked me at the start of photographing weddings 13 years ago that I would meet these amazing people and would be photographing them all, at some point over ten years, all over the country, I would have laughed. This group of humans opened my eyes to the world and the things we should be fighting for. They’re some of the smartest people you will ever meet and have more love for the people they encounter than some can ever imagine. I am so thankful for all of these beautiful souls.
We were watching Crater on and at the end they used the and it reminded me of when and I got to adventure Iceland in a van and stay our last night there. 10/10 hotel, highly recommend. Now we’re both at home with our babies. Oh how time changes.
Day 6️⃣ We start heading home tomorrow. Made some final explorations and souvenir purchases. I hung out at the lodge while tanner hiked to that stupidly tall rock I saw yesterday. Rory finally was happy on FaceTime 💕
Day 🖐️ Took a cruise through the Fjords. Cried and felt so extremely grateful.
Day 4️⃣ Took the train to Egersund. Another day with nobody around, had the best club sandwich of my life at a tiny little cafe.
Day 3️⃣ Ramen for lunch, sushi for dinner, wind and souvenirs in between.
Day ✌️ Some shops were open. I got a tattoo of a tin of sardines then listened to a bunch of Garth Brooks at a dive bar.
Norway day one cont. ✨ an empty town
Norway day one. The day we found out nobody gets out of bed before noon and nothing opens before 1 except for Starbucks.
Like a charmed hour and a haunted song and the angel of my dreams.
Got to create with my favorites last weekend. It felt perfect.
Not mad that my kid picked a pizza party at our regular restaurant. Loving B peeking in. Thanks for the photo Jenn 💕
Feeling so lost lately. Maybe looking at pretty photos I’ve made with friends will help.
Week 6: Pattern 🏁
Catching up. Not giving up yet!! Weeks 5, 4, & 3. Nature, lines & emotion 💕
Things I need in my life right now in no particular order:
1: to get tattooed
2: a day at Disneyland
3: nail and spa day
4: a working brain
Closing out week 3 of the challenge with emotion. A room full of people completely obsessed with a couple. Doesn’t get better or more emotional than that.
So the reason I started this challenge is because I needed to push myself to take more day to day photos but also experiment. But part of the pushing comes the fear of failure. What if I don’t like what I make. I took many pictures for last weeks “light” challenge. I hate every one due to flash errors or composition. I struggled with the idea of posting something imperfect and I’ve avoided it for a week. The truth is I just need to show up. Wether it’s perfect or not. The truth is they’re perfect moments. Rory drawing while I got ready in the morning, Cora being obsessed with locking herself in the pantry, Rory loving a flip phone that doesn’t even turn on. I won’t look back when they’re older and think, man I should have composed that better. All I will picture is their tiny bodies existing in the space with me. Perfectly.
Today is the first day of my weekly photo challenge. I knew I wanted to start with a self portrait because I need something to change. I needed to document my life how it’s been. How I’ve struggled so maybe by the time I do my next one in 364 days it’ll different. This year was really good and it was really hard.
•Last year was the year I was really open about mental health and it felt like everyone needed that. So the meds on my nightstand? We tried four different concoctions over the past year. None of which worked well for me. Here’s to this year being more beneficial.
•The clothes in the back on the chair? All things I love but can’t fit into. A memoir for my life.
•My peloton that while it’s not as bad as my chair, it’s still not used as often as it should be.
•Me. On my phone as usual. Struggling to be more present.
So here’s to a year of pushing and changing. In some way or another. Cheers if you’re joining in on this challenge. Post week 1 by next Saturday 💕 Tag me if you do. I’m excited to see everyone’s lives be a little less perfect and a bit more Instagram 2010.
Forever grateful for these humans and every human that trusts me year after year.
Wishing I was back here.
The best OOO I’ve had in 15 years.
Things Rory did great at Disneyland with: meeting characters, waiting in line, riding rides, eating snacks, walking around for hours without a stroller.
Things Rory did not do well with at Disneyland: asking to go back to the hotel every five minutes which then turned into wanting to go home all day.
Yet today she wanted to go back.
I will never not go out of my way to come to
Happiest of Birthdays to . The only person that has met me naked in the middle of a forest, let me shoot her wedding nine months pregnant and document not one, but two babies. I like to think I’m pretty badass but she is top tier badass. Here’s to another year of honest motherhood, mental health and fire wife life. ✨🔥
I think about this moment in 2017 often and think, man, if I only knew then what I know now. Trying to find moments that bring me joy lately and connect me back to fun things like this.
Vacation documentation. ✨
Hands.
Today was the first day in a long time I didn’t feel like a failure as a mom in some shape or form. (We still have bedtime so fingers crossed) Today was the first day I’ve seen this smile from Rory in a really long time. Today I was the friend for someone that I wished I had when I was at my lowest. Today I felt like my brain finally started to rewire itself. Tomorrow is another day and all these may not be true tomorrow but documenting the one time it was okay is so I can look back and not feel like it’s not always lows.
Anyone else want to go just sit in a field of flowers and stare at the sky with me?
The thing about images is that they’ll never mean as much to others as they do to you. Nobody will have the same exact feelings or memory from that moment. To be honest that’s why I love them. It’s not my place to cull out moments that aren’t perfect because that’s what I think looking at them. That moment might be perfect to them. Even this quiet moment to an observer means nothing. To them, it’s a moment together on their wedding day, sitting at the same table they got engaged at. You can’t get that story from this photo, but they have that story and that’s all that matters. ✨
This is a very accurate representation of my life currently. Being stuck at home (even with our amazing yard) has us all stir crazy. Cora gets to go back to school tomorrow but Rory will be home the rest of the week. I’m not made to be a stay at home mom. Nothing has tested my patience more than the last six days. I want nothing more than to go sit down in Coronado at Miguel’s and eat endless cheese dip and drink a mango margarita. Pandemic parenting sucks.
Quarantine, more like borentine. Full of wearing the same outfit, trips up and down the street and visits to our fairy garden.
Now accepting donations of fun pastel pillows and suggestions on what to color to paint behind this flag.
Happy Birthday to two of my favorite women. Both badass moms, spooky, witchy, and sexy with the best senses of humor. I love you both!
Life is hard. Nothing is easy. We wake up every day knowing it could be our last due to a car accident, heart attack, etc. but we shouldn’t have to wake up every morning hugging our kids and saying “bye honey! Have a good day at school.” Very well knowing it might be the last hug we give them because a very preventable situation could occur in a place that is supposed to be nurturing and safe. A place where teachers often give some of these kids the only meal they eat in a day. Or space safe from abuse. I am a teacher. I go to work every day stressed that any sound or scream is an emergency. Freedom is being able to go to work and school not being scared or nervous each day. Not being afraid that you can’t own a gun to go hunting one month out of the year just so you can have a deer head on your wall to prove you’re a man. How much good is that gun going to do for “protecting your family” when you’re not there at their school when someone comes in and murders them?
One of my favorite days each year. Tanner has been volunteering since started a few years ago. I will always take the time to bring our kids so they can watch all these girls doing strong things 💕
San Diego, CA
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