Lyn Fegan Ceremonies

24/12/2025

I've neglected this page but know that I'm thinking of all the hundreds of people I've worked with over the eight years I've been privileged to do this job. Hope you all have as good a Christmas as you can and that 2026 brings you some comfort and joy.

A Christmas for Grieving Hearts

May we, who are still grieving,
whether it be weeks, months, or years,
be spared the pressure to be brave,
or bright,
or healed this Christmas.

May we not be expected to be cheerful
while we are still in survival mode,
or while we may still be experiencing shock or disbelief.

For us who grieve,
December can feel like a stage
we are expected to step onto,
rehearsed lines in hand,
asked to perform versions of ourselves
that no longer exist.

May we accept ourselves exactly as we are,
and may our grief be recognized and accepted
by our loved ones:
in our absence of sparkle,
in the way we leave early,
in the way our eyes wander
when a song comes on,
in the way we measure our energy
like a precious, limited resource.

Grief is not a failure to participate in seasonal celebrations;
it is evidence of a love that mattered deeply.

May we be spared the well-meaning urgencies:
be strong,
stay busy,
focus on the good.

May no one rush us
toward a finish line that does not exist.
Healing is not a holiday task,
and courage does not always look like smiling through dinner.
Sometimes it looks like staying home.
Sometimes it looks like surviving the day
without explaining ourselves.

May this Christmas make room for the invisible,
for empty chairs and altered traditions,
for the ache that sharpens when lights go up
and the world insists on joy.

May we know that missing someone
is not ingratitude for what remains;
it is the continuation of love.

And if peace comes,
may it come gently,
without expectation.

If it does not,
may we still be held,
and be given permission
to be human
in a season
that forgets how complicated love can be.

…and may the spaces they once filled be met with loving remembrance.

~ 'A Christmas for Grieving Hearts' by Spirit of a Hippie

✍️ Mary Anne Byrne

~ Art by Olamik

27/12/2024

24/12/2024

Shared from a family for whom I did a ceremony this year. I have nothing to add.
Have as good a day as you possibly can and take time for you.

19/12/2024

This is a tough time for so many people who've lost someone. I know some will feel that everyone else is being jolly and enjoying life while they just can't join in.
But be assured that there are people thinking of you, enjoy your memories and perhaps try very small steps to make new ones.
Thinking of all the families I've worked with this year and before.
Have as good a Christmas as you can and all the best for the new year.
Take time to take care of yourselves and each other.

22/11/2024

I'm going to miss working with Malcolm. Always professional, but fun with it, compassionate, empathetic and with an awesome attention to detail, he will be much missed in Swanage. Enjoy your retirement!

22/11/2024

I've just discovered it's National Funeral Celebrant Day (who thinks these things up?), so I thought it warranted a post to say how much I love my job.
From meeting a family for the first time and hearing their loved one's story (and some of the stories are amazing!), to writing a bespoke ceremony and then delivering it, this work ticks all my boxes. I love meeting the people and helping them through what is obviously a really difficult time, making sure that I write a ceremony that really reflects the life is very rewarding and delivering it in a way that conveys the essence of the person - all of that fits with my skills.
It's now six years since I trained and I've met hundreds of lovely families. Bring on the next six years. I'm very lucky to have found a whole new career in 'later life!'

24/10/2024

It’s difficult to know what to say when sleepy Swanage suddenly becomes the lead story on the national news.
I seem to have neglected this page recently and I apologise for that, but I feel the need to say something, to react publicly to yesterday’s shocking news, even if all I can do is state the obvious – I’m thinking of the family and friends of those who lost their lives at Gainsborough Care Home yesterday and of those who are still in hospital.
In a small community like this the ripples are felt everywhere. So many people will know someone whose loved one was evacuated and is now in a strange place, probably confused and upset.
And then there’s the staff, who cared for the residents on a day to day basis and considered them friends. They must be so shocked at what’s happened.
They will all need our support.
And it’s fitting, although coincidental, that Louis Manning Hospice’s Candles by the Sea is taking place at Swanage Bandstand this Saturday 26th between 5.30 and 7.00.
I’m sure Swanage will turn out in force to pay tribute to those who’ve died this year. I’ll be there to light a candle for all the families I've worked with. I welcome this opportunity to remember them all as well as those affected by the recent tragic events in the town.

24/05/2024

07/04/2024

This is such a great option for families.

07/04/2024

This week I've written and delivered three very different ceremonies. Very personal music choices in each one, a steam train sound effect for a steam railway enthusiast and three very different but lovely families to work with.
I love my job!

10/03/2024

This is a fantastic initiative and one that I'm sure will be popular. Look forward to working in this lovely setting.

10/03/2024

Thinking today of the many families I've worked with who've lost their Mum. No matter how well prepared you are, your Mum is still your Mum and that's always special. Many will find today hard but, sadly, that's part of loving someone.
Take care of yourselves and each other. You've got this.