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Falmer, Nottingham (2025)

11/11/2025

THE ONLY BRAISED BEEF RECIPE YOU’LL EVER WANT…

COMFY COOKING: episode two… BRAISED BEEF SHORT RIBS w/ MASHED TATTIES

THIS MEAL WILL BRING ANYONE TO THEIR KNEES… USE WITH CAUTION

- 4 beef short ribs, bone in
- 2 bottles of red wine, something you’d be okay drinking
- 2 tbsp veg oil
- plain flour, dusting
- 4 shallots, halved and sliced
- 2 medium carrots, peeled & roughly chopped
- 2 celery ribs, roughly chopped
- 1 small leek, roughly chopped
- 2 cloves garlic, crushed & chopped
- 2 tbsp tomato puree
- 1.5l beef stock
- 2 bay leaves
- 1 sprig thyme

- 1kg potatoes (small potatoes)
- 1 tbsp salt
- 250g unsalted butter//margarine, kept cold
- 250ml whole milk//soya milk, warmed through
- 2 big pinches salt

1. Pour both bottles of red wine into a large saucepan, bring to gentle boil and reduce till syrupy
2. Preheat oven to 140 degrees Celsius. Pat dry ribs and season with salt, pepper and finish with a little bit of flour
3. Heat oil in heavy, ovenproof dish. Brown ribs on all sides, then set aside
4. Add shallots first and over medium heat, make sure you scrape bottom of pan to get brown bits off
5. Add carrots, celery, leek and garlic, cook till golden brown, again scraping off any fond (brown bits at bottom of pan). Stir in tomato puree and stir constantly for 2 mins
6. Add reduced wine to deglaze, and beef stock. Add back short ribs + juices, and add bay leaves & thyme
7. Transfer to oven for 4 hours till tender and the bones slide off without any effort. Let cool down in liquid for 45 mins
8. Put potatoes in pot with cold water and boil till fork tender. Drain and while still warm, using tea towels and a knife scrape the skin off whilst they’re warm (BE CAREFUL!!!!!!!!)
9. Press potatoes using a ricer and then pass through a sieve (don’t need to pass through sieve - BUT IT’S WORTH IT!!)
10. Return potatoes to a pan and heat on medium low stirring constantly to remove as much moisture as possible
11. Add in butter//margarine & whole milk//soya milk stirring constantly till everything is incorporated. Add in salt to your desire and plate
12 ENJOY

10/11/2025

SLUTTY NUTELLA PIE… EASY RECIPE, RICH & PURE FILTH

SLUTTY SPECIALS: Episode 1… NUTELLA PIE

- 275g digestive biscuits
- 50g cocoa powder
- 100g unsalted butter, melted
- 2 tbsp granulated sugar

- 600g cream cheese
- 400ml double cream
- 400g Nutella
- 100g icing sugar, sifted
- 2 tsp vanilla extract
- pinch salt

- 100g Nutella
- 50g butter

1. Blitz biscuits in food processor, mix in coca powder and fold in melted butter. Stir till evenly is incorporated fully, looking like wet sand
2. Grease a cake tin (either with veg oil or with baking paper) so it’s easier to remove - lay baking paper circle at bottom of the tin. Press crumb mixture to the bottom of the tin and around the sides. Place in fridge for 30 mins to set
3. Warm Nutella in a heat proof bowl oven boiling water gently and stir constantly (this will make it easier to pour into cream mixture)
4. In a separate bowl, beat cream cheese until smooth. Add sifted icing sugar, vanilla and salt… mix until smooth
5. In a separate bowl using whisk, whip double cream until soft peaks are formed
6. Add whipped cream into other bowl, and pour in warm Nutella. Fold everything together until incorporated
7. Pour filling into biscuit base and smoothing the top
8. Set in fridge for minimum of 4 hours (overnight preferred) or 2 hours in freezer
9. When it’s set, melt butter and Nutella in a heatproof bowl over boiling water and mix till they’re mixed
10. Pour Nutella and butter spread on top of set pie and spread mixture around till smooth. Set in fridge for an hour or so
11. ENJOY

09/11/2025

COMFY COOKING: EPISODE 2… RATATOUILLE

THE COZIEST RECIPE FOR THE EASIEST VEGETABLE DISH AROUND… PRETTY, COLOURFUL, TASTY

- 2 red bell peppers
- 2 yellow bell peppers
- 2 orange bell peppers
- 2 tbsp olive oil
- Pinch salt
- 1 small onion, finely diced
- 2 garlic cloves, minced
- 4 ripe tomatoes, peeled
- 1 sprig thyme
- Pinch salt
- couple cracks black pepper

- 1 aubergine (eggplant)
- 1 small yellow squash
- 1 small courgette (zucchini)
- 4 small Roma tomatoes
- Olive oil
- Salt + pepper

1. Preheat oven to 230 degrees Celsius
2. Roast peppers whole until skins blister 20-25 mins. Once roasted, place in a bowl and cover with clingfilm, leave for 10 mins to soften
3. After, deseed and take the skins off the peppers
4. In a pan, medium heat, sauté onion till translucent. Throw in garlic, thyme & tomatoes and sauté for 5 mins
5. Chuck sautéed mixture and deseeded peppers into a blender and blend till smooth
6. Use a mandolin or slice veggies to the same width (IF POSSIBLE USE VEG THAT HAS SIMILAR DIAMETER AS EACH OTHER)
7. Get an oval or circular oven proof dish and spread blended mixture at the bottom, ensuring it’s even.
8. One by one, making a pattern in any order you’d like, but follow it all the way around and fill the dish with the sliced veg
9. Drizzle olive oil and salt on top, and cover with a cartouche - (GET BAKING PAPER, DRAW AROUND TO GET THE DISH SIZE AND CUT OUT SHAPE) lay on-top of the veg and bake in oven at 135 degrees Celsius for 1 hour and 30 mins
10. ENJOY

05/11/2025

COMFORT COOKING SERIES: EPISODE 1… BOLOGNESE

ASK MUM, DAD, BROTHERS, DOG… WHOMEVER… THEY ALL AGREE THAT THIS BOLOGNESE IS LEGENDARY

BUT I’M NOT GREEDY… NOW YOU CAN ALSO EAT SOME LEGENDARY FOOD WITH THIS BOLOGNESE RECIPE AND ALL THE COMFIEST COOKING YOU COULD

- 1kg ground beef
- 1 onion
- 1 carrot
- 1 celery
- 3 cloves garlic, minced
- 1.5 fillets anchovies (SECRET INGREDIENT)
- 1.5 tbsp tomato puree
- 400ml chicken stock
- 2 x bottles passata
- 2 bay leaves
- Pinch salt

1. Firstly prep all your ingredients: mince garlic finely & anchovy fillets together. Dice small celery and carrot. Grate onion
2. Heat pot on medium high ish heat and pour olive oil in. Gently shape all the ground mince into little patties and fry on both sides until brown for all of them - YOU WANT THE BROWN STUFF AT THE BOTTOM OF THE POT (CALLED ‘FOND’… FULL OF FLAVOUR)
3. Once all the meat is browned, set aside into a bowl
4. In the same pot, turn down the heat to medium and pour a little more olive oil in
5. Sauté garlic and anchovy mix in the pan for around 30-45 seconds until fragrant
6. Add chopped veg in and sautee for 4-5 mins until the onions look translucent and carrots soft…ish
7. Add tomato puree and mix until all veg is evenly coated in puree; and cook for 2 mins
8. Add all the cooked beef back into the pot and using a whisk bash it down until they separate into fine (pea-sized) chunks (I prefer mine chunkier ;)
9. Add all chicken stock and mix until incorporated
10. Add passata in and mix again until evenly coated
11. Throw in the bay leaves and bring the bolognese to a gentle simmer. Once simmering, turn the heat down slightly and leave the mixture to reduce by at least a small third - stirring every so often (do this for around 2.5-3 hours - LONGEE YOU LEAVE IT… THE BETTER IT’LL BE)
12. Once thickened slightly and reduced by a third… serve up with cooked pasta of choice
13. ENJOY

31/10/2025

50,000 LEGENDS… SO MUCH LOVE FOR YOU 💜

A LITTLE CAKE TO CELEBRATE WITH A BAKLAVA CHEESECAKE RECIPE TO STEP UP YOUR CHEESECAKE GAME

- 2 packs of phyllo pastry
- 175g melted butter

- 200g crushed pistachio nuts
- 1 tsp ground cinnamon
- 1/4 tsp ground cardamom
- 4 tbsp icing sugar
- 8-10 crushed digestive biscuits

- 600g cream cheese, room temp
- 220g sugar
- 120g sour cream
- 3 eggs
- 1 tsp vanilla extract

1. Preheat oven to165 degrees Celsius
2. Crush pistachios, with digestive biscuits until it turns into a crumb with a bit of texture
3. In a bowl mix the crumb mixture with cinnamon, cardamom and icing sugar. Set aside
4. Cream the cream cheese with the sour cream until smooth, using a whisk attachment or by hand (machine is preferred). Add sugar, and add eggs 1 @ a time whilst machine is on a slow setting until evenly incorporated. Set aside
5. Grab yourself a cake tin and brush melted butter on the inside
6. Then lay a sheet of phyllo pastry inside and repeat, facing the other side to make sure no holes are in the pastry sheets. Brush with melted butter on-top of the phyllo sheets
7. Add 4-5 tbsp of crushed pistachio mixture on-top and even it out with a spoon
8. Repeat with 3 more layers of phyllo pastry sheets (making sure there’s no holes) and then add the mixed cream cheese mixture
9. Gently lay a phyllo pastry sheet on-top and repeat with one more. Then brush with melted butter and add more pistachio mixture on-top, gently spreading it evenly
10. Trim the excess phyllo sheets hanging over the edge of the cake tin
11. Bake @ 165 degrees for 1 hour with a water bath below it in the oven (fill an ovenproof dish with water). After 1 hour, take the water bath out and bake for another 30 mins
12. Once the timer has finished, turn the oven off and leave in there for 20 minutes
13. Take out of the oven and let it cool completely before setting in the fridge for minimum 4-6 hours (ideally left overnight)
14. Top with remainder of biscuits/pistachio mixture and finish with dried rose petals around the outside
15. ENJOY

21/10/2025

MAKING & QUAD BIKING… HAD WORSE DAYS

pr trip x

15/10/2025

GARLICKY SCHNITZEL SALAD + WARM GARLIC-HERB SALAD

THE BEST WAY TO MAKE YOUR SCHNITZEL YOU’VE PROBABLY NEVER HEARD OF

- 2 chicken breasts
- 1/2 cup all purpose flour
- 2 eggs beaten lightly
- 1 tbsp vodka
- 1.5 cups panko breadcrumbs
- 1/2 cup white sesame seeds

- 6 garlic cloves

- arugula
- 1/2 red onion, thinly sliced
- 1 cup white wine vinegar
- 2 small heads chicory

- 2 tsp whole grain mustard
- 3 fried garlic cloves
- 2 tbso honey
- 1/3 cup olive oil

- 3 fried garlic cloves
- fried rosemary leaves
- 1/2 lemon juiced
- 1 tsp honey
- 2 tbsp mayo
- 2 tbsp hot sauce

1. Fry garlic and rosemary in oil around 140 degrees Celsius until golden and remove
2. Transfer 3 garlic cloves, along with whole grain mustard, honey and oil; and blend until smooth
3. Thinly slice red onions and place in bowl, covered in white white vinegar with salt and let sit for 10 mins to pickle
4. Throw arugula, chicory and pickled red onions into a bowl and pour vinaigrette on top, and toss until evenly coated
5. Finely dice remaining fried garlic and rosemary and place into bowl with mayo, lemon juice, honey and hot sauce. Mix until everything is combined
6. Butterfly chicken breast and cover in baking paper, bash until it’s evenly thin
7. Coat in flour, dust off excess. Whisk eggs lightly with vodka, leaving some air pockets. Place floured chicken in and coat on each side. Cover in panko breadcrumbs and sesame seeds mixture
8. Fry on both sides until golden and keep moving it around to avoid burning
9. Plate up and ENJOY

08/10/2025

FRIDAY NIGHT DINNER WITH THE FALMER’S

TIME SPENT WITH LOVED ONES IS NEVER WASTED… ESPECIALLY CHOWING DOWN ON A FEAST

WONDER IF YOU’D LIKE TO SEE THE NON-PG VERSION OF THIS 😂

25/09/2025

THE ONLY RECIPE & CURE TO ANY SICKNESS

BORSCHT

IT’S RED… IT’S MEATY… IT’S GORGEOUS

- 2.25 litres of cold water
- 500g beef bones (with meat attached)
- 1/3 onion, chopped
- 3/4 carrot, chopped
- 1.5 stalks celery, chopped
- 1.5 bay leaves
- 5 peppercorns
- 3/4 tsp salt

- 1.5 medium beetroot, peeled and grated
- 2.5 medium potatoes, peeled and chopped
- 1.5 carrots, peeled & grated
- 0.75 medium onion, chopped
- 1.5 cloves garlic, minced
- 1 bay leaf
- 2.5 tbsp tomato puree
- 1/2 white cabbage, finely sliced
- 1 tsp white white vinegar
- salt + pepper, to taste

1. Combine beef, onion, celery, carrot, bay leaves, peppercorns, salt and enough water to cover the bones entirely
2. Bro mg to boil and then lower to simmer for 1.5 hours until meat is falling off the bones. Skim off scum whilst it’s simmering
3. When finished, let cool slightly and remove bones & strain stock. Discard of the strained veg
4. When meat is cool enough to handle, take off bones and shred. Set aside and discard the bones
5. Prep veg separately: beets, carrots, onions, potatoes and cabbage
6. Add beef stock to large soup pot and add shredded meat, grated beets, potatoes, tomato puree, salt and bay leaf. Bring to boil then simmer
7. Whilst that’s simmering, heat 1 tbsp in a small saucepan and sauté onion and carrots for around 7-10 mins, then add minced garlic and satuee for around 30 seconds. Add the tsp of white wine vinegar and sauté until the vinegar smell has disappeared
8. Add sautéed veg to simmering veg and stir in. Add sliced cabbage and incorporate into soup
9. serve with a dollop of sour cream and fresh dill (trust me… makes it better)
10. ENJOY

YOU CAN BLITZ IT ALL TOGETHER LIKE I DID OR LEAVE AS IS… COMPLETELY UP TO YOU

Falmer

11/11/2025

10/11/2025

09/11/2025

05/11/2025

31/10/2025

21/10/2025

15/10/2025

08/10/2025

25/09/2025

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