11/07/2026
Something happened on Tuesday after church, and Iâve been thinking about it ever since.
I was walking home with a friend when we met two siblings from a group I belong to. They stopped to greet her, and as usual, I stepped aside to give them room to talk. Thatâs something I naturally do.
When we continued our walk, she brought up something they had said about me.
Apparently, they feel Iâm not very receptive and that I hardly smile, especially around people I donât know. She even said I come across as someone who is difficult to approach.
I wonât lie, it stung.
My first reaction was, âThatâs not me.â
Anyone who knows me well knows I laugh a lot, joke a lot, and can be very outspoken. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized they werenât completely wrong.
One thing Iâve noticed about myself is that I donât know how to move from having a nice conversation with someone to actually building a friendship. We can talk today, laugh together, and thatâs where it ends. I enjoy my own company, and I donât easily insert myself into peopleâs spaces unless I genuinely feel welcomed.
Unfortunately, that can easily be mistaken for pride.
What really got to me was when my friend said the younger of the two ladies has always liked me and admired me, yet she used to find me intimidating because I looked unapproachable.
That was hard to hear.
When those siblings caught up with us later, I apologized. Not because I felt I had intentionally done anything wrong, but because I realized I may have been giving people an impression I wasnât even aware of. I gave her a hug, and we moved on.
This isnât the first time Iâve heard something like this. In fact, Iâve always suspected that some people in the group donât really âlikeâ me, so I thought. Maybe this is part of the reason. Maybe she was just the first person who cared enough to tell me instead of keeping it to herself.
Iâve been thinking about it ever since.
Sometimes weâre busy being ourselves without realizing how weâre coming across to other people. It doesnât mean we should pretend to be someone weâre not, but I think itâs worth paying attention when the same thing keeps coming up.
So Iâm taking it as something to work on. I still love my personal space, and thatâs not changing. But I can smile a little more. I can be warmer. I can make it easier for people to walk up to me.
Who knows how many beautiful friendships weâve missed simply because we both thought the other person wasnât interested?
Do you think this about me too?đ€